The New Narrative

1) Kevin Rudd thought our policies were so good, he adopted them.

2) We are going to adopt all of Rudd's policies, even though they are all the same as ours, so that proves we're changing.

3) Except workchoices, we still back that, when no one's looking.

4) And apologising to indigenous Australians, won't do that either.

5) Also Kyoto is a 'symbolic' thing, which means we're still liars, we just need to lie better.

King Rat

Just who is Brendan Nelson? Well let's see what he was like in 1994...

BMJ 1994;309:562 (3 September)

News

Focus: Sydney: The rise and rise of Brendan Nelson

S Chapman

Earlier this year a colleague returned to Sydney from what had promised to be a dull meeting of the Royal Australasian College of Physicians in Hobart, the drizzle soaked capital of Tasmania. But he beamed from ear to ear. His glee was at the oration given by Brendan Nelson, the 36 year old national president of the Australian Medical Association.

Nelson, a Tasmanian GP who wears a diamond earring, had torn into the medical profession for its sleepy social reform agenda. He berated them for shirking all the big public health debates other than those that were self serving. He urged them to use their knowledge, positions, and privilege to support the things that really mattered in their communities. At the end of his speech nearly all stood and applauded.

Nelson took over the AMA' presidency in 1993, after serving an apprenticeship to the affluent, avuncular orthopaedic surgeon Bruce Shepherd. During the 1993 federal election Shepherd campaigned on behalf of the (now deposed) Liberal leader, John Hewson, prompting Prime Minister Paul Keating to describe him as the "most ugly, most rapacious union leader" in Australia.

Nelson, in contrast, is from what the Labor party calls a "true believer" background. Grandson of a communist and son of a Labor loyalist he had been a Labor party member, but he resigned when he took up AMA politics so as to be seen as nonpartisan in his dealings.

Nelson has transformed the public face of AMA politics. Once seen as the guardian of medical privilege the AMA is now most often heard through Nelson's plain speaking about oppressed groups, reform, and bungling bureaucracy. The Australian media find him irresistible. While many in the Australian health system are mesmerised by the emperor's new clothes of the 1990s (health outcomes, customer focus, etc) Nelson speaks no nonsense talk about real health problems. In the past 12 months he has breathed life into debates about drug policy, euthanasia, homosexual law reform, environmentalism, immunisation, declining funding for medical research, and hotels supplying women with free drinks to attract hard drinking men. His most sustained efforts have been directed at Australia's appalling Aborginal health record, the health consequences of unemployment, and hounding the tobacco industry.

In August it was widely reported that Nelson would be forsaking medical politics for the popular variety. He confirmed that he had been approached by both main parties, and the main intrigue now focuses on which way he will jump. He remains tight lipped. The Liberal party in Australia has been out of power since 1983, and despite rhetoric about a new direction, remains bereft of leadership. Nelson would give the party a charisma transplant but at great risk of arousing Australian's suspicion of turncoats and political opportunists.

The Labor party keeps no seats warm for old comrades who "rat" on the party by leaving it. For some too Nelson remains tainted by his past association with Shepherd's overt support for the Liberals and by the abiding suspicion that the profile he gives to public health issues is a Trojan horse for the AMA's real business: the preservation of doctors' incomes.

But many suspect that Nelson's first duty is to social medicine - to the unemployed, Aboriginal health, the further humiliation of the tobacco industry - all subjects where the Liberal party has a weak record. These are issues where he is at his most animated. Those who know him find the public stand consonant with the private man. He has often said pragmatically that political change requires working from with in a major political party. Labor therefore seems most likely. If Nelson jumps into the desperate-for-talent Liberal boat he may just sink with it.

How prophetic. Nelson appears to have become captain of one of the Titanic's lifeboats. He's now leader of a party so dumbstruck by defeat they've opted for a former union boss and Labor party member to lead their party. This is after having run a massive scare campaign on union bosses. There's a rumour that Nelson won because he wouldn't say sorry to Indigenous Australians while Turnbull would. If this ideological blind-spot is all that's holding the Liberal party together, it's going to be a long three years for them.

Rudd's Cabinet & Ministry

Cabinet and Ministry

Kevin Rudd, Prime Minister.

Julia Gillard, Deputy Prime Minister, Education, Employment and Workplace Relations, Social Inclusion. [this is a good indication of things that are going to be important in a Rudd govt.]

Wayne Swan, Treasurer. [meh, just do what the RBA tells you]

Chris Evans, Leader of the Government in the Senate, Immigration and citizenship. [can't be worse than Andrews]

John Faulkner, Special minister of State, Cabinet Secretary, Vice president of the executive council. [excellent choice here. Faulkner is a real stalwart in parliament, streets ahead of the filthy Eric "aids and" Abetz.

Simon Crean, Trade. [I suppose we'll see what he can really do, can't be worse than Vaile, as long as he doesn't bribe Saddam again]

Stephen Smith, Foreign Affairs. [great tactic, Smith could kill a party in a whorehouse that backed onto a liquor store. Our foreign partners will sign anything to get away]

Joel Fitzgibbon, Defence. [let's see what happens when super hornet gate comes out...]

Nicola Roxon, Health and Ageing. [another good choice, much better than the former minister for asbestos].

Jenny Macklin, Family, Housing, Community services and Indigenous Affairs. [another good performer].

Lindsay Tanner, Finance and Deregulation. [well he is an articled clerk...]

Anthony Albanese, Infrastructure, Transport and Regional development, Local Government, Leader of the House.

Stephen Conroy, Deputy Leader of the Government in the Senate, Broadband, Communications and the Digital Economy. [a potential banana skin?]

Kim Carr, Innovation, Industry, Science and Research. [Another lefty, yay!]

Penny Wong, Climate Change and Water. [another stellar performer and organiser, she'll do well here I think]

Peter Garrett, Environment, Heritage and the Arts. [placed where he can't do too much damage]

Robert McClelland, Attorney-General. [should show slightly more signs of life than the previous occupant. Whatever you do Robert, DO NOT open that sarcophagus in the corner of your new office.]

Joe Ludwig, Human Services, Manager of Government Business in the Senate. [I worry that this guy could be Rudd's Downer... I hope not.]

Tony Burke, Agriculture, Fisheries and Forestry. [Has he ever even seen a cow?]

Martin Ferguson, Resources and Energy, Tourism. [Pro nuclear power energy minister... hmmm...]

Outer Ministry

Bob Debus, Home Affairs.

Chris Brown, Assistant Treasurer, Minister for Competition Policy and Consumer Affairs.

Alan Griffin, Veterans Affairs.

Tanya Plibersek, Housing, Status of Women.

Brendan O'Connor, Employment Participation. [oddly renamed "Brenda O'Conner" by the SMH]

Warren Snowdon, Defence Science and Personnel.

Craig Emerson, Small Business, Independent Contractors and the Service Economy, Minister Assisting the Finance Minister on Deregulation. [should do well]

Nick Sherry, Superannuation and Corporate Governance.

Justine Elliot, Ageing. [she isn't Christopher Pyne]

Kate Ellis, Youth, Sport.

Parliamentary Secretaries

Maxine McKew, Prime Minister and Cabinet. [Max the axe, is Rudd keeping his potential enemies close? That woman is a serious potential leadership threat]

Greg Combet, Defence. [he's probably as confused as we are]

Mike Kelly, Defence.

Gary Gray, Infrastructure, Transport and Regional Development.

Bill Shorten, Families, Housing, Community Services and Indigenous Affairs. [once single handedly rescued two Tasmanian miners using nothing more than a teaspoon and a video camera]

Bob McMullan, Foreign Affairs. [see, I told you boring people to death was our new foreign affairs policy position]

Duncan Kerr, Foreign Affairs.

Anthony Byrne, Prime Minister and Cabinet.

Ursula Stephens, Social Inclusion and the Voluntary Sector.

John Murphy, Trade.

Jan McLucas, Health and Ageing.

Laurie Ferguson, Immigration and Citizenship. [hmm...]

John Howard is at Stage One

John Howard comes to terms with his role in the Liberal party's loss

Dr. Hibbert: Now, a little death anxiety is normal. You can expect to go through five stages. The first is denial.
Homer: No way! Because I'm not dying!
Dr. Hibbert: The second is anger.
Homer: Why you little!
Dr. Hibbert: After that comes fear.
Homer: What's after fear? What's after fear?
Dr. Hibbert: Bargaining.
Homer: Doc, you gotta get me out of this! I'll make it worth your while!
Dr. Hibbert: Finally, acceptance.
Homer: Well, we all gotta go sometime.
Dr. Hibbert: Mr. Simpson, your progress astounds me.

Tony Abbott, Liberal party people skills coach and public relations manager, was on Lateline this evening. According to him, Howard has convinced himself that the election defeat wasn't his fault. Although, the defeat was half Peter Costello's fault. Whomever is responsible for the other half was left as an exercise for the listener. Also Malcolm Turnbull, who arrived at Howard's last supper at the back gate, changing the Liberal party into the Democrats is totally going to work. OMFG Malcolm watch out... you're a plucky historian but there's a crazed albino Catholic monk right. behind. you. Pausing only to adjust his cilice, Tony informed us that Costello had eaten many meals at the Lodge in Canberra (presumably in the servants quarters) and that he hadn't had a 'foursome' (as god is my witness, the transcript shall not prove me a liar) with Tanya, Janette and John. Whatever vomiting while laughing sounds like, I made that noise. He went on to inform us that he would totally get in on that action. I wish I was lying. Costello is rumoured to be writing a book. I'm sure he'll dedicate a whole chapter to Tony Abbot. As soon as I heard he'd be on Lateline I knew we'd be in for a spectacular performance.

More wankers with guns, more dead seals.

I see from today's news that some yob has been entertaining themselves by killing Australian Fur Seals. I find that strange, seeing as we have hefty penalties for the monsters who do things like that. Oh wait, we don't.

Why do Australian courts seem to give free rein to people who commit wanton acts of cruelty upon animals?

There was a recent case where a Brisbane guy who kicked a family's kitten to death and subsequently threatened the family and vandalised their house when they reported the crime to police was jailed and then set free after only 5 days when a judge overturned his puny one month sentence on appeal.

I would say a month in jail isn't nearly enough for someone like that, and not nearly enough for the bastards who go around killing seals, either. When are Australian judges going to wake up to themselves and start handing down real punishments for animal cruelty? Currently we may as well have Super Nanny in charge of our so-called justice system, seeing as the worst an animal abuser gets is the 'naughty corner' punishment, no matter how heinous their crime.

We're Not Racist, But..

We hear Camden is a wonderful place to raise a family...

The heads of two pigs have been found on stakes at the site of a proposed Islamic school in Sydney's south-west.

About 6am today, police were called to the site, on Cawdor Road, Camden, where they found the animal remains and a number of other items, a police spokesman said.

The pig heads had been "elevated off the ground" using stakes, he said.

The spokesman would not say what the other items left at the site were.

He said he was not aware of any messages being left behind.

The Quranic Society's plan to build a primary and high school for 600 students at the Camden site has sparked a strong backlash from residents.

This month about1000 people attended a meeting to protest against the building of the school.

SMH

Backlash: The term is commonly applied to racial discrimination and religious discrimination committed against members of minority groups in response to an event or circumstance, such as the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001. Backlash also refers to 'victim blaming' which occurs when people in the environment erroneously shift blame from the perpetrators of crimes to the victims and/or further blame the victims for resulting controversies and conflicts after the crime is reported or discovered. Blacklash in these circumstances is often a result of inaccurate speculations and conclusions that the victim must be at fault for the crime that was committed.

Remember the racist filth that was posted in the comments last time we wrote about KKKamden? About how it was about a community 'defending' themselves from, well a Muslim school, not unlike a Catholic or Jewish school. It's funny isn't it, if it were a Jewish school a lot of the same people would be opposed to it, they just wouldn't dare pull stunts like this because the very bright glare of indignation and negative public opinion would be focussed on them. Because they're Muslims the vermin are thick on the ground like roaches in a dark room.

This is in no small part due to the fantastic job the previous government did to legitimise expressions of hatred, so long as they were appropriately directed against the right group of untermenschen. This is what scum like Pru Goward mean when they say Howard fought against 'political correctness'. They mean he used the office of the leader of the nation, the goodwill of voters and the honour and dignity of leadership to shield the worst of us, winking at them while they tore at everything that made us a nation instead of race based clans. Selectively applied terror laws, vicious media persecutions, every second word out of the the foul, disgusting Bronwyn Bishop's mouth. Right down to the final, dying days of the fetid regime and Jackie Kelly's racist stunts. Even to the point of getting the AFP to run their Stalinist 'Terrorism hotline' ads.

All they've done is create a fertile climate for fear and hate. Not once have they attempted to unite the country in anything except hatred of the other. It's gotten to the point when shit like this is CONSTANTLY happening and no one seems to care! Racists want Muslims to 'integrate', the previous government's stalking horse for persecution, yet they have to do it outside 'white' communities. When they cower in terror in their own communities, ghettoised by the rest of Australia, they are attacked for that, too. Maybe it's time we had a backlash against racists and their enablers?

mail@camden.nsw.gov.au

To whom it may concern

I'm writing to inquire what, if anything, the council is doing to address the legions of racists popping up out of the woodwork to vent their bile against the proposed Muslim school? The events in your otherwise lovely corner of Australia are a disgrace to the nation and have received international attention, adding to our country's embarrassment. I hope and trust someone there is aware of what's going on and is doing something about it. Pigs' heads on stakes is not how our nation should find itself on the front pages of the world's newspapers.

Yours in Trust
Gam

John Howard, The Good

Standing up to moronic gunlosers after Port Arthur. I have no idea about his motivation but he did the right thing in the teeth of fearsome opposition from his own allies. Even now stupid halfwits peddle conspiracy theories about how it was all a secret Howard plot to disarm all Australians so he could control us all. For taking deadly weapons away from idiots he deserves some respect and it should be acknowledged here. It showed that he wasn't incapable of doing the right thing, just that most of the time, he wasn't willing to.

Coalition threatens to oppose rollback

KEVIN Rudd has demanded the Coalition back Labor's new industrial relations laws in the Senate, dismissing Liberal Party threats to block the legislation as an affront to voters and a denial of his electoral mandate.

Ex-Government Gazette (really need to think up a new name)

Chris Pyne, new minister for head in the sand

That odious creep Christopher Pyne was on Lateline tonight insisting that we've had "eleven and a half years of great government" or something to that effect.

Wrong, fuckwit. Australia obviously disagrees or they wouldn't have voted you out.

God I hope he loses his seat next time around.

Caroline Overington on the internets

Caroline Overington has been quite a popular view on our blog of late, with L'Affaire Overington appearing in the top 5 most viewed pages after being linked to by a few sites. Surprisingly, 153 of those views came from Google searches even though we don't appear on the first page for most of the searches that were made (mostly pertaining to the emails Caroline Overington sent George Newhouse before biffing him upside the head on election day).

I doubt Caroline will be the new Lara Bingle- I would say she's more of an Andrew Quah. I'm also expecting a lot of our traffic to drop off now that the election is over- we had our biggest Sunday ever on the day after the election with 293 visits from 240 unique visitors, where usually we see a significant drop in traffic on Sundays.

Howard's Eulogy

Spoken by Paul Keating



Note how little about Howard changed in office.

Fishnets urged not to run

In today's Australian:

Last night, Liberals suggested Mr Turnbull and Dr Nelson had the most support, although Mr Abbott could expect support from NSW conservatives, and Mr Downer was being urged not to run for the leadership.

Awww come on! I want Alexander Downer fighting for the leadership! In fact, I want him to win: he would be a disaster for the Liberal party. Where's their sense of fun? Having him as party leader would be utterly hilarious- they'd be a laughing stock thanks to his immaturity, his rudeness, and his overdeveloped sense of private-schoolboy superiority and poncy accent!

Pleeeease, Libs, elect Alexander Downer to the leadership!

Playboy jokes of the month

This month it's their Christmas edition with Paris Hilton's equally ho-ey pal Kim Kardashian on the cover. In Kim's defence she's pretty and has a nice body with natural boobs, so she may as well be famous for that as being friends with the eternally useless Paris Hilton.
====================

A small boy wrote to Santa Claus, "Send me a brother."
Santa wrote back, "Send me your mother."


A young boy asked his dad, "What is the difference between confident and confidential?"
"You are my son. I'm confident about that," the father said. "Your friend next door is also my son, but that's confidential."


The trouble with political jokes is that they sometimes get elected.

A man was walking home through the park one night and saw a woman in the shadows. "Twenty dollars," she whispered.
The man had never been with a hooker before but decided that for only 20 bucks he couldn't afford to miss out. They were going at it in the woods when all of a sudden a light flashed on them.
"Hey, what's going on here?" barked a policeman.
"I'm making love to my wife," the man answered indignantly.
"Oh, I'm sorry," said the cop. "I didn't know."
"Well," said the man, "I didn't know either until you shined the light on her face."

A note for the Greens

One thing I noticed yesterday when handing out how-to-vote cards was that quite a few people asked me where the Greens' preferences went in the senate. The problem was that the Greens' voting advice was something along the lines of 'just put 1' in the Greens' box at the top. A small corner of the HTV paper was dedicated to the senate voting advice- so small that many of the people I handed out HTVs to thought it covered only the Lower House and that there must be either a separate senate advice pamphlet or something printed on the back. The Greens' senate vote is the more important of the two when it comes to determining the party's place in the Australian political landscape, so I think a little more effort should go into making its senate voting advice more obvious.

Also, there was no indication of where Green preferences went in the Senate. From memory I thought that their 2nd preference went to the Democrats in the senate, but I could have been wrong on that as I was also under the impression that the Greens had arranged to preference Labor in the House of Representatives- an impression that turned out to be wrong when I looked at the Greens' how-to-vote card and saw the ALP candidate in 4th behind the Democrats and the independent candidate Charles Worrington (or whatever his name is). That still meant the preferences went to Labor, as neither James Page for the Dems or Worrington were likely to pose any threat to Labor, but in the Senate I was essentially flying by the seat of my pants when it came to giving advice to anyone who asked.

Personally, I voted below the line. But I can understand why no-one wants to: filling out that blasted 'tablecloth' of a ballot paper takes forever.

Greens voters, I would say, tend to be less mindless about where their vote is going and where their preferences are going. They are less trustful in politicians and behave accordingly- and for a good many of them that means finding out where the party they are voting for has directed preferences.

If I ever hand out HTVs for the Greens again I will be making sure to take along information on how the Greens are directing their preferences right down the line- I sure as hell couldn't remember all the parties and preferences off the top of my head. This is something that's important and something that Green voters seem to care about. Definitely worth the party's while to look into the issue and provide the people who want to vote for them with the information they desire.

Oh and one final piece of advice for the Greens: those happy-clappy ads with the 'take action [strum... strum...] green action' song really sucked. I know the Greens might prefer positive advertising but a more succinct message would have done the trick a lot better. Also, the Greens have a great policy for putting more money into the public health system, yet none of that was mentioned on their how-to-vote cards or on those dopey ads. The Greens stand for more than just lame songs and 'green' issues! Healthcare was one of the key election issues in the mind of the public this election, and while the Greens had a great policy they did a poor job of getting it out there.

Dump WorkChoices

Here's a photo we snapped the other day in St Lucia. Nice to see the deed has finally been done!

Good riddance to WorkChoices.

Living in Hicksville does your head in

Empty streets and empty heads:
Welcome to Kempsey, NSW

Yesterday after I got home from handing out how-to-vote cards for the Greens at the polling booths, I had a phone conversation with my brother, Richard.

He is in the electorate of Cowper, in NSW, and voted for the sitting National Party member, Luke Hartsuyker.

What got me was why he voted for Luke Hartsuyker:

"I wanted to vote for some funny party but there was none"

"I didn't vote Labor because I don't want Kevin Rudd to get in"

"All my mates were voting for the Nationals"

"What? The Greens are shit!" [asked why] "They're just shit... and if you vote Green it helps Kevin Rudd to get in".


This sort of mindset reminds me a bit of what I had to say about the young male Howard-voters in our polling day post. Needless to say, I verbally slapped him :)

Labor's Paul Sekfy lost to the National Party's Luke Hartsuyker by a margin of less than 1000 votes. On the bright side, that means that Cowper is now a marginal seat. On the not so bright side, all the people like my (university-educated) brother who have the capacity for rational thought and yet choose not to inform themselves about the issues that affect the country are stupider than the dumb bogans who make up the bulk of their neighbours in places like Kempsey. Wilful stupidity is the worst kind of all.


On catching up with the various scandals and gossip, of which there seem to have been quite a lot lately, Richard told me that one of his best friends has told him he's gay. He also made me promise not to tell Mum and Dad, which seems kind of obvious, as Dad in particular is massively bigoted against gay people- something that has informed Richard's own attitudes towards gay people over the years, and something I've had many, many arguments with them about, including the last time we were home.

Richard used to think being gay was a 'choice'. Now, after his friend told him that he hates himself for being gay and that it's not a choice at all, he has changed his mind. That's a good thing. But I still find it mind-boggling that it takes something that close to home to give him pause for thought about the way society's attitudes affect some people. There's no reason for his friend to hate himself for being gay- it's growing up surrounded by homophobic pseudo-macho attitudes and anti-gay bigotry that has done it.

This friend of Richard's has always been my favourite- always polite and respectful, extremely hard-working and despite growing up in Kempsey, not a yob. Just a normal, nice guy. I think that's what surprised Richard the most- that his friend is gay and always has been yet is a perfectly normal person. He shouldn't be surprised, but he is. Being gay in a place like Kempsey must be pretty hellish for his friend, but in a way I'm glad something like that has happened to open my brother's eyes to reality.

I just hope his friend is ok.

Greens Policy, Future Directions?

Some ideas:

1) Abandon the idea of being primarily a check in the senate

2) Recognise that a new industry and culture are about to be created. Namely renewable energy technology and the general culture of 'greening' existing businesses, cities etc.

3) Be prepared to actively meet the needs of these new industries. Greens senators would be uniquely placed to agitate for beneficial legislation and look out for their interests.

4) Use the money and profile generated by 3 to move candidates and policies at local govt. levels. The Greens are unlikely to ever get a house of reps seat but councils, mayors etc should be easily in reach especially in urban areas.

Costello out.

Last night, as Peter Costello gave a speech prior to John Howard's concession, he looked as though a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

Today we found out why- not only has John Howard been soundly thrashed, which must have been somewhat satisfying even for Costello, Costello has decided not to be part of the inevitable leadership bloodbath that is bound to take place. Instead, he is serving out the next term and then retiring.

Interesting times ahead for the Liberal Party. I suppose Costello was sick of being knifed in the back. I believe him when he says he's not leaving out of fear of a term in opposition. There are plenty of ambitious, nasty types in the Liberal party who are willing to fight it out for the top job, but I think in terms of providing an acceptable face to the public, Malcolm Turnbull will be all they've got. I wonder if they'll learn that lesson straight up or have to face a humiliating defeat next election with Downer, Abbott or Nelson as leader in order for Turnbull to get the top job?

Mind you, I've seen a lot written about how Turnbull winning in Wentworth means he is well positioned to lay claim to the leadership. Turnbull didn't win in Wentworth- Newhouse lost it by running such a crappy campaign and hiding from the media whenever anything got tough. I think Labor have lost the best opportunity they'll have in a long time to win Wentworth.

While I'm on the topic of crap Labor candidates, I'd just like to say how glad I am that Nicole Cornes didn't win. What a bimbo. Fancy being preselected for a party and having absolutely no idea what their policies were. And having voted for John Howard. What were the Labor Party thinking? Choosing Cornes means they effectively threw away the seat of Boothby. Cornes didn't deserve to get up, and the voters decided accordingly. Last night on the ABC she was very keen to blame her treatment in the media for her loss, while she emphasised that she and her team had helped Kevin Rudd win. News to Nicole: no you didn't- you only help Kevin Rudd win if you actually win your seat. I'm glad the Labor Party weren't vindicated in their choice of such a useless candidate.

Our polling day

Gam and I were sent to the Indooroopilly East polling place at St Andrew's Anglican Church. We snapped a picture of one of the houses typical of those in our area to have a 'Michael Johnson' sign out the front, thinking it would be a nice contrast if we could get some pictures of houses with a Greens/Larissa Waters sign out the front- all the ones we have seen have clearly been povvo student houses! I shot the picture rather badly, but you can see the Michael Johnson sign in the bottom left corner of the photo.

We arrived a good half hour earlier than we needed to, partly because we hadn't done this whole how-to-vote thing before and wanted tips from the Greens person there before us. 'Rosie', a girl probably in her early 20s, told us she was a fashion designer. She had a really bubbly personality and seemed to be really chatty with all the other HTV people. Apart from her, one guy who looked like he was in his mid-late 20s and one 20-ish Liberal HTV-er who I think was the daughter of one of the middle aged Liberal HTV-ers, we were the only young people there. By the time we'd been there for 4 hours we were the only young people there.

We were next to the Democrats HTV guy- a lovely, chatty old guy who works as a researched in the education department at UQ. One of those people who always have a story to tell- he was great company. Jim Page, the local Democrats candidate, showed up for a while. He seemed pretty nice too, although he gave us the title of an online essay he had written called 'the problem of the pro-war Greens' which we asked him about, and it turned out that only two of 12 conflicts he referred to in the essay were supported by the Australian Greens. He tried to associate the Greens with support for Israel's invasion of Lebanon last year because the German Greens supported it- he claimed there was a worldwide green movement and implied that somehow the Greens in Australia bore some responsibility (even though they stridently opposed Israel's invasion). So on that matter it really wound up with us having to agree to disagree. Nevertheless he seemed like a nice guy.

Want some Green?

The Liberal Party HTV-ers seemed decent enough too, taking the time to introduce themselves. Around lunchtime, one of the old Liberal HTV guys who said he'd already had lunch gave Gam a sausage roll! We didn't have much to do with the Kevin07 HTV people, because they were cannily positioned away from the rest of us at both ends of the footpath leading to the main path up to the church hall (we were on the main path along with the Dems, Libs and a lone Family First guy).

Observations:

Family First wore white t-shirts with blue and red print, and handed out HTV cards that were very similar-looking to the ALP HTV. Not cool.

You could pick the people who were going to get only a Liberal HTV card a mile off- the middle-aged ones were invariably more expensively dressed, and the women wore more makeup and high heeled shoes. Lots of young guys got only the Liberal HTV card- I could pick them a mile off too, and was only wrong on two occasions- the first being a well-dressed and sweet-looking little old lady who refused all other HTVs and when I offered her a Greens one said "oh good, the Greens!" and toddled off to vote, clutching her Green HTV! The second time was when a young guy I had pegged as a straight Lib actually came straight to me for a Green pamphlet and didn't get one from the Libs. Usually it was the other way around- very few young guys even took Greens HTV, and when young guys came in groups they often looked reluctant to stand out from their friends by taking any HTV cards that their friends hadn't picked up.

Unfortunately I could also pick the people who were going to get only a Green HTV card- most of them were 'alternative'-looking and not at all expensively dressed! I took it as a good sign that I couldn't really pick a stereotypical 'Kevin07' voter, because that meant they were getting a broader selection of the community.



There was one funny moment when a yellow Humvee pulled up. Gam and I have seen this monstrosity around town- it stands out like a sore thumb with its large size, blocky shape and wanky 'HUM 08' plates. We had the late-20s to early 30s guy inside pegged as a Liberal voter even before he got out of the car. Sure enough, he strode straight up to the Liberal HTV people and took their card when he must have overheard one of the ALP HTV ladies say something about his car and the environment (I didn't overhear the comment), because he stopped, turned around and went off his head at her before going in to vote. The Liberal HTV people looked suitably embarrassed at being even vaguely associated with this guy. On the way out he offered a parting shot about being off to destroy the environment with his car, but by this stage everyone was looking at him and laughing and he looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole and die... Gam and I even felt a bit sorry for him- he kept looking back at us like he expected us to say something rude to him because we were wearing Greens badges. I have a feeling, from his extremely defensive attitude, that the guy has copped a lot of shit for buying such a wanky car and is really beginning to regret it. Still, I couldn't stifle a giggle, especially when someone noticed that he had kept his car running for the entire time he was inside voting, after defending its environmental credentials.

At the end of the afternoon the Family First guy came around and offered everyone some jellybeans... Gam didn't want to take one, but he gave me two, so Gam wound up eating a FF-tainted Jellybelly. I hadn't had anything all day except for two coffees but I felt surprisingly fine, just a little bit sore from standing up for so long- the voter 'traffic' had slowed to a trickle by 3.30pm, so I was able to sit down for a bit.

Before we left we had permission to snap a picture of this family- Matthew, Marianne and the adorable baby Laura with her Kevin07 sticker. Unfortunately there was only a 7% swing against Michael Johnson in Ryan, not enough to oust him from his cushy 10% margin, but that was still a pretty good result for a blue ribbon Liberal seat and I'm sure they had a great night celebrating Kevin Rudd's victory :)



On the way home we again passed the house that we photographed on our way to the polling place... the owner was out the front washing his Mercedes. Heh.

Hail to the Chief!

Australia, I present to you the highest ranking elected Liberal official in the country: The Retarded Monkey, aka Brisbane Lord Mayor Campbell Newman.

Incredible, isn't it?

Moments

Good Stuff

0) Rudd mentioning Bernie Banton in his speech. I clapped.

1) The cheer from the counting room crowd when they first heard Howard was behind in his seat.

2) "Julia! Julia!" making it hard for Kerry to hear himself speak. It was brilliant.

3) Peter Costello looking like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

4) Peter Costello thinking he's going to be the leader of the opposition because Howard said it would be a smooth transition to him.

5) Howard saying that the next leader would be decided by the party, taking responsibility for the loss and failing to retire then and there, screwing Costello one last time and confirming he lies simply because it's in his nature.

6) The atmosphere at Howard's concession. It was like he was Jim Jones. This guy kept screaming about how much he loved Howard. I was expecting them to break out cups of poisoned kool aid any minute.

7) Wilson Tuckey getting the fright of his life.

8) Greens polling so well, though it was largely skewed to certain seats. Went as high as +20% in some of them.

9) Downer claiming that 'bad timing' caused their election loss.

10) Learning that the libs are much easier to listen to... in opposition.

11) Joe Hockey talking about how devastating it is for his lib friends sacked for operational reasons, while the world's smallest violin plays for him.

Sad stuff:

1) Bartlett losing. Totally undeserved.

2) Ditto Kerry Nettle, she'll be missed.

3) Brough losing. He was way, way down on the list of govt. members deserving the chop.

4) The reptillian Pyne making it back. He announced he wants to slither into the deputy lib position, so it's not all bad news.

5) The hopeless Ron Boswell in the senate.

6) Steven Fielding not being struck by lighting. I'd had my hopes but on the balance, I'll take it.

Goodbye and good riddance, John Howard.

And good luck to Australia!

Today was the end of an era, and one I'm not sorry to see the back of.

Tonight, I feel like Australia has been given a clean slate. A better result would have seen the Liberal-National coalition banished to the political wilderness with only a few members fighting each other for survival. A better result would have seen not just Mal Brough lose his seat but some worthier victim's of Australia's ire: Kevin Andrews, Tony Abbott, Philip Ruddock, Alexander Downer.

Ultimately, however, we have achieved something wonderful- not only ridding ourselves of John Howard's government, but thanks to Maxine McKew and the people of Bennelong it looks likely that John Howard has become only the second Prime Minister in Australia's history to lose his seat as well.

Even tonight, before any changes have been made and any policies enacted there has been a real change in that we now have a female Deputy Prime Minister in the form of the fabulous Julia Gillard, and we now have a PM with a wife who isn't a simpering automaton who's spent her life as a professional housewife- welcome Therese Rein!

I don't expect a Rudd government to be perfect by any means, and I already have a lot of criticisms to make of their stated policies. Indeed I hope that they do make changes to a lot of those policies when they officially form government. But this change of government is without doubt a change for the better for Australia, and I cannot even begin to express the happiness and the hopefulness I feel at the opportunity Australia has presented itself with by delivering victory to Kevin Rudd.

VICTORY!!!

We've won. Go out and celebrate the repudiation of Howardism. No party will ever, ever again dare to threaten the rights of working Australians. Howard appears set to reinforce the lesson of Stanley Bruce. Push the Aussie worker and they'll bloody well push you back!



This lesson is still valid, Kevin Rudd. Never forget what your mandate is, or become as slack and complacent as Howard.

Also Howard loses with a lower primary than Mark Latham LOL!!!

The deranged Ms Overington

Above: artist's impression of the spat.

Oh my god. We just got home from handing out Green how-to-vote cards all day, and I received email notification of a comment by a user called 'votin'belowtheline', who directed us to this story.

When she called us up on Wednesday and threatened us with defamation action, we wondered why she would bother harassing the writers of such a small blog. The following reveals the answer all too clearly: Caroline Overington appears to be utterly deranged.

Award-winning journalist Caroline Overington hurled abuse at Labor candidate for Wentworth George Newhouse before slapping him across the face at a polling station in Sydney's east, witnesses say.

Ms Overington, a Walkley winning reporter who works for The Australian newspaper, has been embroiled in a dispute involving a series of emails to independent candidate Dani Ecuyer urging her to preference Wentworth Liberal MP Malcolm Turnbull.

Ms Ecuyer is the ex-girlfriend of Mr Newhouse.

Ms Overington also sent a series of flirtatious emails to Mr Newhouse, which were then published in rival papers.

Polling booth attendants and voters were shocked to see Ms Overington stride up to Mr Newhouse, strike him across the face and then walk away, those who saw the incident told AAP.

Despite witnesses saying that Overington slapped Newhouse, she has apparently denied it but "admitted pushing him away with an open hand when he approached her", according to the report on news.com.au (biased because it's her employer, mind).


Election day gold.

If I were Caroline Overington I wouldn't be too worried about my job, though. That partisan dickhead Glenn Milne acted even worse and is still sitting pretty.

UPDATE: The SMH is reporting more eyewitness accounts plus what Newhouse had to say about Overington's actions:

Witnesses saw Overington, an award-winning writer for News Ltd's The Australian, punch Mr Newhouse in the head at an eastern suburbs polling station after the two had a heated exchange.

Mr Newhouse said: "I was standing there and it was a completely unprovoked attack. I suddenly got whacked.

"It was more than a slap. It felt like a closed whack."

Surprised witnesses said Overington and Mr Newhouse engaged in a "vigorous heated debate" inside the gate of the polling station about lunchtime yesterday.

"Then she punched him around the ear. George was visibly shocked," a witness, who did not want to be named, said.

"Newhouse then shouted, 'I'm going to report this.'

"George was not a happy camper and nor should he be. He was the aggrieved party."

Help! What's Happening?

Need to know what's going on? Try:

The ABC

Pollbludger

If anyone has more suggestions, please post them in the comments!

Election nightmare?

Wasting time this morning, fraught with nerves over the outcome of today's election...


Last night I dreamt that I was so busy helping out at the polling booth I forgot to vote. It was awful... such a relief when I woke up!

Stan Grant rumoured to resign

According to a report in The Australian this morning, SBS' suckiest newsreader, Stan Grant, is rumoured to have tendered his resignation.

If that's the case, SBS will really have shot themselves in the foot- not only did they drive away Mary Kostakidis by undermining the quality of their news programming and routinely giving newbie Stan Grant the more prestigious interviews, now Grant looks likely to be leaving and SBS will be left looking rather silly over their attempt to become more like the shitty commercial television stations in an attempt to siphon away some of their ad revenue.

While there's hope:

Spotted this in a comment on the Facebook group 'I wish I lived in Bennelong so I could vote for Maxine':

In Crikey today...

Form a queue! I am told there are more than 900 people who have volunteered to man the polling booths for Maxine McKew and there is a waiting list if you want to help! Is this unprecedented? They may not be waiting for the PM with baseball bats but there is certainly a rush on to meet him at the frontline!

Enough. Dear god, enough.

The difference between this election and the other two federal elections I've voted in is that this time there seems to be a real hope of getting rid of John Howard.

I can't even tell you how much I looked forward to voting on my 18th birthday in 2001 after John Howard stole all Pauline Hanson's policies and then added his own little extras- the election won on a wave of vitriol and hatred that Labor was afraid to stand up to. I looked forward to having my say again in 2004 where Mark Latham put forward some really good policies and yet I still couldn't bring myself to vote anything but Green because I could see that Latham's own party had undermined him in trying to soften his image. The failure of the ALP to counter the Howard government's attacks on Latham was so glaring that that it seemed to be a deliberate strategy by people in the party- almost as if they saw another term of John Howard as being more in their interests than Latham continuing to wield power as leader.

This time, there appears to be a mood for change. Not so much change of policies as change of leader, which is why Kevin Rudd has been so careful of the areas in which he differentiates himself from the government. I want Kevin Rudd to be Prime Minister only because it means we're rid of Howard. It's the first step on the road to making Australia a better country.

Now the polls are showing that Labor's lead over the coalition is narrowing: the ALP could win 52% of the two-party preferred vote and still not win government. Even if the polls were predicting a landslide I could scarcely bring myself to believe that the day is almost here where we can oust John Howard. With the polls that close, I know I'm going to have a sleepless night.

I've had enough of John Howard. I can remember being 14 and wishing I could vote so I could do something to get rid of him. Tomorrow will have been two weeks since I turned 24. Next year Gam and I will get married. Within the next decade we'll have children. I want to raise our kids in a country that has reached a stage where it has repudiated John Howard and all he stands for. I want to teach our kids about the John Howard era as a thing of the past, not something continued under Peter Costello, or Tony Abbott, or Alexander Downer that they will learn to rail against as they reach the stage of life where they start to think about the future they will build.

I can't think of a country I'd rather live in than Australia- not permanently. We've got a lot of good things. We have also allowed John Howard to take the credit for the great things we have- we allow him to spout pseudo-patriotic statements about mateship and being Australian while he continues to believe that we should have a foreign monarch as our head of state. While he continues to fawn at the feet of the imperialist US administration, smiling wetly as he receives the infrequent pat on the head from his US masters. The man who undermines our identity as a country simultaneously tries to take credit for creating it.

I can't believe what we have allowed John Howard to get away with.

I can say in all honesty that tomorrow I will feel devastated if we allow it to happen again. Australia- I'll never forgive you!



Note: as a sign that I can scrape together an ounce of optimism that John Howard will tomorrow be consigned to the dustbin of history I am creating a John Howard tag. This will aid those fortunate enough in the future to not remember his time in government to spend time researching the man as the relic he is.

Mary Kostakidis and SBS settle: bad news for viewers

Mary Kostakidis and SBS have reached a settlement. It's no doubt confidential and it will no doubt mean that Mary is never, ever coming back to SBS, which will continue to get more and more shithouse in terms of its news programming.

In a statement of claim lodged with the Federal Court, Ms Kostakidis wrote that SBS's head of news and current affairs, Paul Cutler, had given "instructions for the [news] bulletin for be 'less grim' and for there to be at least one tabloid story to end each program''.

It was also reported that her split came after a souring of relations between her and news co-host and former Today Tonight presenter, Stan Grant.

Muse Concert

Gam and I went with our friends Niall and Sophie to the Muse concert at the Roma St parklands on Wednesday night. We were due to meet with them for drinks at some bar inside the casino, but we were refused entry because we were both wearing thongs... while foreign tourists traipsed past us out of the bar and casino wearing identical footwear. Not that it mattered- this way we got to keep our record of never spending any money at the casino intact.

We thought we were very clever taking a blanket along to the park with us so we didn't have to sit on the ground, and were comfortable during the set by the very ordinary band who preceded Muse, but as soon as Muse came on people began standing up, forcing the people behind them to stand up, so we wound up standing for a solid couple of hours over the course of the set. Not fun!

The light show was good- we were up the back so we got a couple of good photos of the lights but no closeups of the band.

The music was incredibly loud. I think that Muse's music has a level of intricacy that means it's better suited to the indoors- quite a lot of detail was lost in the wall of noise that emanated from the large speakers. Unfortunately the event allowed under 18s in, which meant there was no shortage of teenyboppers to annoy us at various times throughout the event. Though I found they were mostly drowned out by the noise of the music, Gam found them pretty irritating. There was a funny moment when 3 of them popped up in front of us during 'supermassive blackhole' and started dancing. Or, rather, 'dancing'.

When we arrived I had been pleased to note the 'smoker's area' over near the portaloos, thinking that that meant I wouldn't get smoked all over. It was good while the lights were on, but as soon as Muse started playing and the lights went down, the bastard smokers all brought out their cigarettes in the crowd and started sending up plumes of smoke for us to breathe. Queen street mall is usually worse, so I can't complain too much, but I would like to see smoking banned in public areas of any kind, and the bans enforced.

Thankfully it wasn't the sort of crowd where there were too many trashed idiots around to ruin it- it was pretty sedate, really. The food vans and merchandise stands made it feel like more of country show than a big concert, even though there were so many people it must have been a sellout crowd. I couldn't resist buying some fairy floss- I love fairy floss- but even with Niall and Sophie and Gam to help me out we couldn't finish the whole bag. I must be getting old!

Help the Greens on polling day!

Last night I got an email from Elizabeth Guthrie asking if Gam and I could help out at a polling booth on Saturday:

We have a space for the morning 8am to 1pm at our New Market South booth (Parker Street, New Market - off Kelvin Grove Road) which we would dearly love to fill with some enthusiastic Greens supporters.

Gam and I have already arranged to help out at a booth in Ryan, but if anyone is able to help Elizabeth and the Greens at the New Market booth or any other, please consider donating a couple of hours of your time. Every election up until now all I've done is vote, and I'm always left with the feeling that I wasn't doing quite as much as I could be to get rid of John Howard, so if you've felt that way too, assuage your guilt at your previous election-day apathy by handing out some HTVs.

Here's a final message from Elizabeth:

If you want to help the Greens on Saturday, vote for them in both the upper and lower house. But you can also help out on election day. If you turn up at a polling booth and it looks like they need a hand ask them for a badge and a pile of how to votes and start handing out. This is how small actions turn into big changes.

Tell Me How to Vote!

So how should you vote? Damned if I know. But you can probably answer a few questions on www.HowShouldIVote.com.au. Don't make a decision based on your final result. That would be extremely stupid. What you can do is plug in your answers to a whole bunch of 'issues' and at the end, if you're lucky, you can see how candidates in your electorate match up with you. Including seeing their responses to the same questionnaire. I've said it before, in Australia there is no excuse for not voting in your own interests. We have an embarrassment of information sources readily accessible to each voter. If you voted for someone and you didn't really know what they were about, it is your fault.

Shrek Returns to Swamp, Finds Donkey

Joe Hockey and Jackie Kelly discuss campaign strategery

As if being the poor goose that has to defend Workchoices isn’t enough of a burden, now Joe Hockey has to try and put out the fires of those political pyromaniacs of the Kelly Gang in his own seat – in 48 hours.

Shreks electorate of North Sydney is filled to the brim with people of a certain moral persuasion on social issues, their delicate Naw Shaw sensibilities being almost legendary…. Dahrling.

But out in the Bogansville of Lindsay, uber-Bogan Jackie Kelly and her bourbon swilling coterie of mental midgets thought it would be a really shit hot idea to start handing out fake ALP pamphlets depicting Labor being under the thumb of mufti-madness.

Gold. Read the rest at Possum's Pollytics.

Go see the interview with Kelly. Make sure to watch right to the end. Laurie Oakes tears her a new one.

Howard's team: desperation and dirty tricks

Gary Clark with wife and retiring Howard government member Jackie Kelly. Kid's head has been erased from the shot because it's not their fault their father is a slimebag involved in promoting racial hatred as a vote-winner.

From the SMH:

The Australian Electoral Commission has been asked to investigate whether Liberal Party members acted illegally by handing out leaflets designed to appeal to anti-Muslim sentiments.

Labor has alleged the husband of retiring Liberal MP Jackie Kelly, Gary Clark, was involved in the scandal, along with a member of the Liberal Party's NSW executive Jeff Egan.

Important people, eh? Not just a couple of nobodies or 'rogue individuals'. Nothing new from the Libs, just more dogwhistle foghorn racism. Pricks.

The ABC had more detail:

The flyer purports to be from the Islamic Federation of Australia, a group which does not exist, and thanks the Labor Party for supporting Muslim terrorists.

The fake pamphlet says: "we gratefully acknowledge Labor's support to forgive our Muslim brothers who have been unjustly sentenced to death for the Bali bombings".

It called for more mosques to built and also says: "Labor was the only political party to support the entry to this country of our grand mufti reverend Sheikh al Hilali and we thank Hon. Paul Keating for over-turning the objections of ASIO to allow our grand mufti to enter this country."

The Australian's item on the story provides 'balance' by mentioning all the individual acts of vandalism of Liberal party campaign posters etc. that have occurred recently, because we all know that vandalising campaign posters is as bad as stirring up racism in the community.

Further acts of vandalism have actually included peoples' personal property- something I would not condone at all (the posters are another matter), but I'd argue is still less harmful than the vicious effects of racism:

Meantime, a resident of the seat of North Sydney said a campaign poster for Liberal candidate Joe Hockey that was displayed in her front yard has been destroyed, and a car window smashed.

"Joe Hockey's picture had been destroyed and a bottle had been thrown through the back of my husband's car," said the woman, who did not wish to be identified.

"I find it very offensive that because of the poster, that is why they've done it."

She said the vandals did about $1000 damage and the incident has made her think twice about displaying election material on her property again.

Federal Liberal candidate for the seat of Macarthur, Pat Farmer, said he has had more than 2000 campaign posters destroyed in the past two weeks, while his home and office have also been vandalised with graffiti.

And John Howard says he can't detect any real animosity towards him and his WorkChoices policy in the community. Really?