Competition was tough, with Gaultier in the running...And the award goes to....
Me!
1. Riding to uni and running late, a niggling thought entered my head that I hadn't put the assignment I had due today in my bag. I shook off the thought, figuring that I think that every time and I'm usually just, as Gam says, 'being a panickus'. So I didn't stop and check, even though we were only at the corner of our block and it would have taken only about 2 minutes to ride home and get it.
2. I got to uni and discovered it was missing. "No problems!" I thought, "I'll just ride home and get it after my group have finished for the day". When I got out of class, it was a little cloudy, threatening rain in a few hours... perhaps.
3. Got home, found my assignment buried under yesterday's notes that I'd excavated from my bag prior to heading off to uni.
4. At some point I took off my helmet, riding glasses and gloves (probably when I went to the bathroom, come to think of it...). I put them all on and headed back to uni with my assignment.
5. As soon as I got out of the driveway it started to rain. Figured I would just be a little bit careful crossing the road, as drivers tend to go a bit nuts in the rain. I gave up riding on the main road to uni a few months ago- too many near-death experiences with car drivers breaking the law. Took the shortcut up Glasshouse road and encountered a massive truck driving down the wrong side of the road. Pulled over into the gutter and sucked in my stomach to give it room.
6. Figured I'd tie up my bike at the closest official bike-stand thingy. As with most of the stupid bike stands around uni, the little metal loop was too small to fit the bike lock through. I tied it up next to a bunch of other bikes on the handrail of the wheelchair-access ramp instead. Put my hands to my chin to take off my helmet and discovered I wasn't wearing it. I rode all the way to uni without noticing that I'd forgotten to put my helmet on! See point 4: I'd seen my helmet right in front of me, and could have sworn blind that I'd worn it out the door. I could have sworn blind I'd felt the damn thing on my head when I was riding.
7. After handing in my assignment, I tossed up whether I should:
a) do the right thing and walk my bike home... in the pouring rain
or
b) forget all the road safety lessons I learned in primary school ("if you don't need a head, you don't need a helmet!") and ride home sans helmet, hoping I wouldn't encounter any difficulties that would result in me losing my brains on the road or footpath.
I chose option b, making the small concession of taking a shortcut across the AFL oval (that had had sprinklers operating on it in the hot sun earlier in the day- what happened to stage 3 water restrictions?). I figured I'd be hard pressed to suffer head injuries on soft grass.
Sure I rode on the footpath most of the time and arrived home safely, but riding without a helmet means that I am officially Dickhead of the Day.
Now I know exactly what it means when people say they would forget their head if it wasn't screwed on... blaargh.
7 comments:
Riding to uni and running late, a niggling thought entered my head that I hadn't put the assignment I had due today in my bag. I shook off the thought, figuring that I think that every time and I'm usually just, as Gam says, 'being a panickus'. So I didn't stop and check, even though we were only at the corner of our block and it would have taken only about 2 minutes to ride home and get it.
This is where you needed a copy saved on a USB. ;)
All university documents should be stored on your computer, onto the memory card on your mobile phone, a few stashed on your digital camera's card, PDA, CD/DVD-RW, MP3 player, on any other computers in the house, kept in your gmail mailbox, hidden and encrypted on a campus computer - all it takes is a single candle and all your hard work is gone.
Or, just get a notebook. Or USB key.
And as for the whole dickhead thing:
"Study shows helmets increase cyclists' risk"
First, motorists passed, on average, eight centimetres closer when he was wearing a helmet. Second, he was hit twice — once by a truck, once by a bus — each time while wearing a helmet.
Ah, the old, no helmut-raining quandry. I too have succumbed to that temptation. Usually I just went super slow, an let the record reflect: the only time I've been hit by a car, or anything else, has been when I was wearing a helmut (thank christ).
Do I empathise or what. No question I could have been the proud recipient of many a dickhead award over the years :)
In all honesty though, I've never ridden to uni without my helmet on -- that's one I'm yet to forget.
I have a USB but my assignment was printed in colour, so I didn't want to fork over $10 or so to have it printed at uni...
Larry- that study also showed that cars kept a greater distance when the guy wore a long-haired wig- at least the fact I'm a girl might have worked in my favour!
When I was at school I had a big old yellow clunker of a helmet.
I came back to a free period to find they'd drawn a big cock and balls on it in a permanent marker.
Hilarious...
You only win dickhead of the day if you thought riding without your helmet was a good idea, which you didn't!
Post a Comment